I must look like a person that needs advice, because recently I have been given tons of it. Actually I am running away from all the advice I never asked for; the marital advice from the three-time-divorcee, the parenting advice from people that have never had experience looking after kids, and especially the running advice from people who have never attempted to run. Yep, it must be the New Year when all the new resolutions bring out the advice givers out from the comfort of their hypocritical, bigoted comfort zones. The all time pet peeve is what I call retroactive advice: giving you a blow by blow account how exactly they would have done it, and therefore how you should have done it. Which would have been useful. Had they given you the advice beforehand.
All this misguided advice makes me really angry which is lucky. I run better when I am in angry. This works in my favour for a few runs but accumlative anger is exhausting. The Marcothon pretty much robbed me of any lingering sense of joy around my running accomplishments and so I direct the anger inwards towards myself. I went against my instincts that doing the Marcothon was not a good idea and instead was swept away in a culture that says quitters are wimps. Now I have to pay that price. None of my usual tricks meditation, mudras and mantras are working their magic. Most days I run I really feel like I am running backwards or not at all. People walk faster than I run at the moment. My heart is not in it. In a desperate attempt to keep going I resort to running to music on my husbands phone. It completely disorientated me and made me nauseous. His taste in music is really that bad.
I take encouragement that I am still motivated to go for a run. It is when I am actually running I find the motivation has left me behind and I wonder what I am running for? Sometimes I get the eery feeling that runs mirror where I am in life. I think it is time to get back on the meditation rock. I am going to do an intensive ashtanga yoga course and drop back to only 3 runs a week. If I get my head in the right place the runs usually follow.The best advice I have ever been given has been from myself. It may have not originated from within me but often the source is so clever that it slowly plants a seed somewhere in me so that when the time is ripe it can grow, and perhaps run, with me.
“It’s a skill to know how to give advice. However it is ALSO a skill to take advice. I believe this skill to know how to take (good) advice is a key differential between those that cross that finish line, and those that don’t.” - Nilofer Merchant on August 23, 2011in Entrepreneurship
2 comments:
I am half envious that you stuck with Marcothon, and half satisfied with my decision to stop after a week. I just wasn't enjoying it at all and was getting bored. My only running goal is to get my 5k time under 30 minutes as that is about my limit before boredom steps in and I stop enjoying it.
I am a little ashamed that I quit, but also pleased with myself for sticking to my decision enjoy running for running's sake.
Well done you for sticking at it though. It might not have been the result you were expecting, but it's still a result.
YOU WANT ADICE I'LL GIVE YOU ADVICE:
- tell them to stick their advice where the sun does not shine;
- highlight the fact to that someone divorced three times is an expert in how to end marriges(ulterior motive there I believe);and
- that person with their 20/20 hindsight advice tell them to shut the **** up if they could not provide the advice in the moment (ie. in real time and they sound like an opposition leader in the House of Commons and an arm chair quarterback when the game is finished or just a lowly pleb or bogan).
Then they will see how "good" their advice really is.
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